Book of Mormon Stories (according to Eve)

So, we read scriptures almost every day as a family. We try to encourage Eve to participate by holding her own copy of the Book of Mormon and sometimes repeating the words we say. Lately she has begun asking for her own turn to read. This is just an example of what she might "read." 

Thoughts on the month

So, our little Emmie-girl is already one month old!

Things are going really well. Emmie still sleeps a lot. She is as sweet as ever. She is a strong little thing.
Eve and Zeke love her! They both love holding her and being around her. Eve always wants to look at her eyes. Eve also uses a sweet, high pitched voice when talking to her. 

The other day we had a conversation that went like this:

Eve: "Can I hold Emmie?"

Me: "No, she's nursing."

Eve: "But I want to hold her. Can you undo her head?"

And then she told me: "You just have so say, 'Hey Emmie, Eve wants to hold you, so you need to stop nursing.'"

 It was pretty funny. 

I have noticed that the transition from 2 kids to 3 has been easier than I expected. I don't know if that is because I was expecting it to be incredibly hard and it wasn't as bad or because of the help of my mom for a few days or because Russ is working from home and I see him periodically. But regardless of why, we have had a pretty easy go of it. 

Emmie breastfeeds well, sleeps good and is a sweet baby! 

I have a lot of weight to lose. I gained almost 60 lbs with this pregnancy and I was about 20 lbs overweight when I got pregnant. So basically I have this huge task ahead of me...and I know I can do it, but I don't really want to. 

I have started playing volleyball. They have a women's church league here and I have gone for the last 2 weeks. It is fun and it feels good to get out there and be active. 

We planted a garden. My parents helped clear out a couple noxious bushes and helped get the area prepped. I planted cabbage, carrots, radishes, zucchini, tomatoes, and peppers. I also plan to plant some green beans in June. I also have several herbs in planters around the house. Our neighbors are master gardeners. Anne, the wife, shared a few herbs with me and I look forward to using them. I have Lemon balm, chocolate mint, sage, thyme, oregano, rosemary, lavender, cilantro, chives, basil and dill. I hope and pray that my vegetables and herbs grow!

Springtime has been lovely here in Idaho. The farmers fields are beginning to sprout their crops, the days are warm and the nights are cool, flowers are blooming and trees are blossoming. It is such a lovely time of year and I am loving it!

We have a few great things to look forward to this summer...we just had Emmie's blessing and lots of family came to town for that. It was fun. Now we leave in a couple of weeks to head to Texas for Kathy's wedding. It will be wonderful to see the Robinson family. 

Then Hy and Sami are coming to town. It has been almost 4 years since we have seen them. We are so excited to see them and to meet Tyler and Lincoln. Plus, some of my sisters will come to town too and that will be loads of crazy fun. 

My sisters and I are also planning to go see Wicked this summer. I have wanted to see it for so long and am looking forward to it. 

Then we'll go to Mackay with some of the Neilson family. Fun times.

So, lots of great things have been happening and there is a lot to look forward too. Life is good and we are so blessed!

Bathed in sunlight

Emmie Diane Robinson was born on Easter Sunday (April 8, 2012). She was born in a birthing tub, at home, with the room bathed in sunlight.

Hers was the most uninterrupted, undisturbed labor and delivery I have had. It was calm and peaceful and happy. I was surrounded by amazing women, my husband and my children. It was such a spiritual experience. There were a few times I was moved to tears, not because of pain, but because of gratitude. Looking into the eyes of my son, watching my daughter put water on my feet, and gazing at my husband all evoked such strong emotions. I was overcome with an overwhelming feeling of love in my heart. 

Contractions began at about midnight on Saturday night. I was so sure that I would have the baby in the middle of the night. Those contractions never got very strong and were pretty far apart, but the anticipation kept me awake throughout the night. Therefore, I didn’t get much sleep that night, but woke up around 7:30am to a couple stronger contractions. I called Janice and she said she would get some things together and then call me again in about 45 minutes to see if my contractions had continued.

Russ had gotten up with the children and fed them. Then he made some French toast for breakfast for his dad, for me and for himself. The surges continued, not too strong, but they were noticeable. So when Janice called, I told her, they had continued and that they were getting closer together then they had been. She said she’d call Suzy and they would be on their way.

So, I labored. I did not watch the clock. We still wanted to do our Easter egg hunt with the kids and keep things “normal.” Russ hid the eggs outside. Then we took the kids out. I was having contractions the whole time.

We began filling the birth tub.

Then it was time for Russell to take his dad to meet the shuttle down to Utah. Russ offered to take the kids with him. So I stayed home and labored some more. I made some more phone calls, I let mom know I was in labor. I dinked around on the computer. I tidied up a little bit and made sure things were ready for the birth.

Russ got home and then I called my friend Jenny to come over. She brought her daughter Hannah with her. Hannah was wonderful with the kids. She played with them, took them outside, fed them, cleaned them up, etc. She was great to have here. 

The midwives arrived around 11:30. They just got to setting things up and prepping the room. I laid on the bed and rested a little bit. I watched the clock, vaguely, for 2 contractions. But other than that, I hardly looked at the clock at all. Janice did check my blood pressure and told me she wanted me to eat. I ate a toasted wheat bagel with peanut butter and some string cheese. I sat on the exercise ball while eating. I visited with the midwives and with Jenny.

Then I continued laboring. I labored in the living room, on the ball, on the bed and just all over the house. It was like time was not there. I never timed any contractions. I just let my body move to its own rhythm. I moved about as I felt I needed too. I got on my hands and knees on the stairs, I leaned against the bed, I rolled my hips around on the ball, I sat in the gray armchair. I just did what I felt my body needed.

The midwives went for a walk. Then they encouraged Russ and I to go for a walk. So we did. My surges were very strong during the walk and I had to stop walking a couple of times. I felt like I needed to go the bathroom. So we cut our walk short.

When we got back to the house, I told the midwives about the surges. I had a contraction while talking to them and I leaned over the back of the gray armchair. I then asked the midwives when I should get in the water. Janice said I could get in whenever I felt like it. So, around 3pm, I got in. 

We had the curtains open and the room was just full of sunlight. The pool was warm. I was sweaty. Russell and Jenny kept cool washcloths on my forehead and a cold hand towel around my neck. Eve came in and watched me. She asked questions. She dipped her hand in the water and scooped water onto my feet, which were on the edge of the pool. She moved in and out of the room as she wanted.

Zeke had been taking a nap and when he woke up he came in and saw me in the tub. He started splashing in the water with his hands. He also moved in and out of the room as he wanted.

My surges became stronger and at one point I asked Janice about not “pushing” but letting contractions expel the baby. I had heard of women who had not pushed but let the contractions push baby out. This concept was foreign to me since I felt that I had pushed like gang-busters with my first two births. Janice said that yes, contractions would get the baby out and that she encouraged moms to do that as much as possible. She expressed it as “breathing baby out.” Just breathing through the surges and letting the contractions move baby down and out. She said it was better for baby and mommy.

So, that is what I tried to do. The surges did become much more intense and harder to breathe through. They got a lot more painful. I cried. It hurt. But, I could feel baby girl moving down. I could feel the pressure of her head and the movement of her down through my body. It was amazing. 

I breathed through about 3 or 4 of those really painful surges and then at some point I HAD to push. I said, “I have to push. I have to push.” I couldn’t help it. My body wanted to push. I pushed once and my water broke. Then I just pushed as I felt the need. Janice said to just push when I felt like it and to take my time and to guide baby down. I pushed a couple of times sitting on my bum, but then I decided to move to my knees.Russ was behind me, ready to help catch the baby. I held onto the edge of the tub with both hands for a short time and then held on with my right hand and pushed my left hand against the bottom of the pool. I pushed, but I also tried to use restraint. I let the baby’s head come out a little bit and then back up a little bit. Then out a little more and back a bit more. It was probably only a few seconds each time, but I tried to let my body stretch. I gritted my teeth and held the edge of the tub so tight, and let the ring of fire burn.

The baby’s head was out! I pushed once more  thinking that would be all and she’d be out. But she didn’t come on that push. I had to push a couple more times, which surprised me. I remember saying “come on!” And then, she came. She was out. I started to flip over while Janice untangled the baby from the umbilical cord. Then Russell and Janice handed her to me and I cried. Russ moved over closer to me and baby and then we began talking to and touching her. A minute or two later she began to cry. We rubbed her, we spoke to her and I just held her. Zeke was there. Eve came in. We looked at the baby and talked about the “white stuff” that was all over her. It was wonderful. 

Janice told us that Emmie had been born with a Nuchal hand which means her hand was up by her head/face when she came out. Her other hand was by her shoulder, and that is why it took a bit more pushing than I expected to get her out. Janice also pointed out the TRUE KNOT in Emmie's cord. She told us it is only the 4th time she has ever seen a true knot. (So, at some point, when baby girl was smaller, she was swimming around and created a knot in the umbilical cord.)

We stayed in the water for about 10 or 15 minutes. Russ cut the cord. He held baby while I got out of the tub and onto the bed to deliver the placenta. Russ gave the baby back and I began nursing her. I delivered the placenta. The kids all got on the bed. We spent time bonding. 

Of all of my births, this was by far the most peaceful, the most comfortable, and the least invasive. Each of my birth experiences have been wonderful in their own right. But choosing to have Emmie at home was a wonderful choice for us and I am so happy with that decision. My midwives were amazing. They were supportive and caring and very hands-off. They let me do what I needed to do. They respected mine and my family’s space. I just have this image in my mind of  them in the background. They were the quiet support behind the scenes, only moving in when asked or needed. They were observers. 

Emmie's birth was powerful. It was sacred. Time was irrelevant. My body moved and obeyed it's instincts. I was an observer to my body's scope and ability to perform this amazing feat. It was amazing.

More Emmie

Eve loves to hold her new sister and comments how tiny and beautiful she is

 The morning after Emmie was born, the first thing Zeke wanted to do when he came into our room was hold his new little sister

A quick video of Emmie

 

and one more video

 

Baby girl!

Emmie Diane Robinson

Born on Easter Sunday, 4/8/12 in a birth pool at home, with the room bathed in sunlight!

4:08pm

8lbs, 21inches

Big reveal!

This is my first dabbling in a large scale art piece. To be hung in the master bedroom. 

Detail #1

Detail #2

Detail #3

Detail #4

Detail #5

Dabbling in spring

On the verge...

 I am having a baby soon. My third baby. Wow. I cannot believe that I am going to be the mother of three! 

I was recently reading a blog I like, the R house and she has me linked on her site as an infertility warrior. 

I was reflecting on that today. 

And it is interesting how quickly we went from no kids to soon-to-be-three kids in just over 4 years. 

Those almost 6 years of infertility seem so far away. I am so far removed from that experience now. And that experience was what defined me for so long.

Now, I am a mom. I feel like I am struggling mom. Trying to maintain a happy, clean, and organized house. But more importantly, trying to love and nurture my children. Trying to say more positive things to my children than negative. Trying to let go a little more and not fret over little things. Trying to be more patient. Trying to live by example (Eve says and does a lot of things that I know she learns from my example and that really freaks me out because I don't like some of those things...) I feel like my goals to be a good parent are often not met.

 Anyway, this pregnancy has been harder. I don't know if it's because I have 2 kids already or what. But these last few weeks have been pretty uncomfortable and sometimes painful. 

I feel like there is a brick sitting on my pubic bone. My back is achy. I am HUGE and my whole body feels cumbersome. I have gained nearly 55 lbs.

 My face has become swollen and pasty. I have horrible pimples all over my shoulders and back. My feet and hands are tight and sore from swelling. Last night my hand became numb and fell asleep like 3 times. Every time I woke up, my left hand was sore and numb and tingly. I waddle everywhere and feel like my hips are going to just fall apart. I am also more cranky and less patient with everyone (just ask Russell.)

However, no matter how horrible I make it sound, I relish it. Not that I like everything about the aches and pains and swelling and such, but I like pregnancy as a whole. I love that I am able to be pregnant. I love that my body is a vessel for another human being. I love that Heavenly Father has blessed me with an abundance of fertility that at one point seemed impossible.

I love that my body is big and swollen with new life.

I am a bit concerned about Zeke. He is just my little clinging koala boy. He loves me to hold him. He loves to have my attention. And I love that he loves me so much. But I worry about the transition when baby comes.

I look at these two and think how excited I am to have another one. How wonderful it will be to meet her. To get to know her. To see what she looks like and to name her. I think about how much I love Eve and Zeke and how I feel like my heart is just expanding, making room for more love for this little one. I am also looking forward to our home birth plans. We set up the birth tub and are preparing for a great experience. I am excited to have the baby to rid myself of all the pelvic pressure and other pains I am having. I am excited to just have her here and be done with this gestation. At the same time I feel like I am on the verge of something life changing. Something that will totally alter my universe. As I do daily tasks around the house I wonder how I will possibly do the same things with three children. With a newborn for that matter. 

And then I just think that it will all be okay. And that I want this. I have wanted to be a mother for as long as I can remember. We fought infertility to get to where we are today and I am so grateful for this opportunity.

This post of random musings brought to you by the slightly hormonal and crazy-emotional thoughts of a 37 week pregnant woman.

Little Projects

 So, I have been working on a couple of small projects lately. I guess you could say it was nesting, but I don't feel that I have been nesting a ton. Just a little bit. 

Anyway, I got these cheap baskets for our changing table. They were chintzy and I could just see the diapers and clothes and blankets getting snagged on the insides of them, so I decided to make some simple basket liners.

Before: cheap and chintzy

After: Much better looking and more functional

I did some with the yellow and white print and then some with this geometric gray and yellow print

 So, my other projects have been artwork. I mainly wanted to do some art for the master bedroom. I am still working on it. Or rather, every once in a while I get all my stuff together and do some painting after the kids are in bed. So, I played around with the paints and stuff when I first got them and decided that the kids room needed some more color and art on the walls. I will have to take pictures of the room itself. One wall is a navy blue and the rest of the walls are a beige color. So, I painted some multi-colored hombre-esque paintings and then I did a larger canvas with a chevron print. I just got them hung up today and think they look decent.

Blue and green fade painting. Orange and pink fade painting.

Multi-colored chevron stripes

And this is what Eve painted. I had an extra canvas and so she used her watercolors on it. I really like this one. I want to display it in the living room or in the master bedroom.

 Anyway, I do need to work on the large canvas for our bedroom. I have started and just need to get working on it more. It will be interesting to see if I can create what I imagine in my head, or create something that is decent enough. It is a HUGE canvas for above the bed and I want it to be good. We'll see!

Favorite things

 One of our favorite things is family bath time...with HUGE bubbles!

Eve Lately

Little bit of hair

Little bit more hair.

Eve gave herself her first haircut. She actually didn't do too bad. She just has a little bit of bangs now.

Eve had her birthday! We drove to Rachel's house in Victor for the weekend. We played in the snow, had a family dinner, birthday cake, and a pinata! Had a great time with the cousins

Eve with her Princess cake that Aunt Rachel made!

Luke and Rachel and Eve.

 As most people know, Eve is very expressive and creative. She likes to pretend all sorts of things. Lately, she has made dresses for herself to be a bride!

Dress and veil made from plastic packaging from a space heater we bought.

She likes to pretend that Zeke is her groom.

Then, we bought some stools and she used the foam packaging to be a bride again. I think Russ may have helped her with this dress and veil though.

She has stopped taking naps, which is fine, but every once in a while, she just gets tuckered out and falls asleep. Most often it's if we are in the car, but the other day I came out from putting Zeke down for a nap and couldn't find Eve. Then, I spotted her. Asleep. Curled up on a dining room chair. She slept for almost 2 hours!

 I just marvel at how quickly Eve is growing. And how fun She is. She definitely drives me crazy sometimes, but not a day goes by that I don't laugh at something she says or does. She is very excited to have a baby sister and she likes to "tickle my baby."

So, that is Eve lately.